Sex in the City: Big apple’s big temptation
Published 08 July, 2008, 05:24
In New York, traditional relationships are becoming less and less fashionable. Having several boyfriends or girlfriends is something of a lifestyle choice for many. However, critics say it just shows a lack of responsibility.
You don’t need to go far to see that New York is celebrating sexual lfreedom. Polyamory – literally meaning “multiple love” – or consensual non-monogamy – is becoming extremely popular here.
A growing number of people are enjoying more than one serious relationship, in which all sides involved agree to have two or more long-term partners.
Thousands of people came out onto the streets of New York to celebrate their choice, and it seems that the number of people who are happy to be open about their sexuality is only growing.
Diana is a polyamorous bisexual divorce lawyer and child custody attorney.
“I’ve decided in my life to focus on having relationships with just two people. I have a boyfriend and a girlfriend because I am bisexual – and that fulfills me much more than if I was in a monogamous relationship for the rest of my life with a man,” she says.
New York’s polyamorous society is one of the largest in the world. It is incredibly fast-growing. The number of people who consider themselves poly is already in the millions.
“In 2000 if you googled polyamory, there were 6,000 hits, and now if you google it, it’s about 3 million,” says Birgitta Philippides, New York’s polyamorous community leader.
Reid, a sex and relationships educator, says relationships are like music. He believes if everyone in the world was polyamorous the world would be a much happier place.
“It doesn’t matter so much if you play classical music, jazz or rock-n-roll. It’s that you’re getting to play the music that really makes you happy. There’d be less hate, less war. If you have five relationships, who has time to declare war on anyone?” he says.
However, psychologists say polyamory may initially seem like a great idea, but problems always arise sooner or later.
“There is usually a primary partner and then there are secondary and beyond. The rules are usually established with the primary partner, and as I said, they don’t usually last,” says psychologist Jonathan Alpert.
Moreover, freedom of sexuality also has the number of people who fall victim to STDs sky-rocketing.
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